The most valuable lesson man has learned from his dog is to kick a few blades of grass over it and move on. ~Robert Brault
Old LFBA has not died despite the fact that the blogging entries are few and far between these days. The Titan Chronos continues to weave his inevitable tapestries as time moves forward whether I participate willingly or not. This last holiday season was now the 3rd endured with my family broken. There is more daily normalcy as this progresses. There remain moments of remorse especially when my son remarks that he does not know what momma was thinking….but we get through. The big pile of emotional and financial manure left by X is slowly composting and every day I kick a little more grass on it. Maybe one day, it will be the best flower bed in the neighborhood!! Continue reading
A truly rich man is one whose children run into his arms when his hands are
empty. ~Author Unknown
As a younger man, I never could have imagined being a Dad. Fatherhood has found me, and for that I am grateful. Continue reading
How reluctantly the mind consents to reality! ~Norman Douglas
Wow…so simple, yet so true. We live inside our wants and desires. We hold fast to our memories and fantasies. We cling to the safety of what was. Continue reading
Wisdom doesn’t necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by
itself. ~Tom Wilson
I have often said that age is much too high a price to pay for wisdom. The above is true though. Age is inevitable. Wisdom must be sought or learned from (often bad) experience. Now, the Buddhist in me, or the Taoist in me, or the Scientist in me will argue that no experiences are inherently bad…we just choose to interpret them that way. But the betrayed husband in me and the father in me can find an easy judgment leaning away from neutrality about the experiences happening these past 2+ years. Continue reading
I get it now. I’m just not that deep!!! No wonder I couldn’t keep up with it all.
You can fall in love at first sight with a place as with a person. ~Alec Waugh
I’m back up on the island in the pacific northwest at the house I bought for us. the second we saw this place, we fell in love with it. I love it still but hate the memories it conjures. Truthfully, I love the memories but hate that they no longer coincide with the truth as I know it now. This is my 5th incursion back since my marriage fell apart again. I wish I could say that it’s easier to be here now, but it is not. I’m here with my son….trying to make new memories that he and I can take with us. It is what it is, but feels incomplete. Continue reading
Knowledge is the true organ of sight, not the eyes. ~Panchatantra
I just popped in to the blogosphere to say hello. I have not abandoned you all…but have been buried in my own thoughts for a while. X is engaged to J. They are getting married in September. This is not knowledge I was hoping to have. It has caused some turmoil amongst his children (well 3 of 4 anyway). Continue reading
I have been away from the blogosphere for quite some time now. I have loosely kept up with other posts and even in my absentia been nominated for a couple of those bloggy awards. I appreciate the nominations and I hope that means that someone is getting something useful from this. I have not yet responded to any of the award nominations….and I probably won’t, but I appreciate the sentiment.
Old LFBA had been in a car accident and decided his injuries from the crash were serious enough to take the trucking company responsible for the crash to court. In court the trucking company’s fancy lawyer was questioning the wayward Buddhist.
It may be time to get back in the saddle, as it has been over two weeks since my last original post. Mind you…I never promised I would write regularly (lucky for you!!)
A silly idea is current that good people do not know what temptation means. This is an obvious lie. Only those who try to resist temptation know how strong it is…. A man who gives in to temptation after five minutes simply does not know what it would have been like an hour later. That is why bad people, in one sense, know very little about badness. They have lived a sheltered life by always giving in. ~C.S. Lewis Continue reading
Forgiveness...it's the other almighty F-word. We are always taught as children to "kiss and make up", to "share", and to "forgive". None of those are easy, especially in the face of a trauma inflicted upon you by the person you are supposed to forgive. It is often the last thing that we want to do, or even consider. I mean, really, why would we forgive someone who has done us wrong, and done so INTENTIONALLY...why?
Our traumas help to form us, but we do have to let them define us. You are not what happened to you. You are not your suffering. The first step in healing is taking ownership of your reactions and choosing to respond in a manner which will help you let go of the past.
You will always see the event as a delineation in your memories; there is a "you" before and a different "you" after that has been changed by the trauma.
This is a nice reminder that assumptions can be wrong, hurtful and ultimately humiliating.
A local United Way office realized that the organization had never received a donation from the town’s most successful lawyer. John, The person in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute.